Sasha Speak's
Humor
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Posted on April-07-13 12:17 AM
13 Strange Canadian Laws You Never Knew Existed
- A Toronto businessman found that to sell edible underwear in his ‘Adult Entertainment’ store, he’d need a food license.
- It's Illegal To Whistle in Petrolia, Ont. A Petrolia city
rep says this unusual law simply aims to limit excessive noise between
11 p.m. and 7 a.m., but according to Article 3, 772.3.6 on the town’s
website, “Yelling, shouting, hooting, whistling or singing is prohibited
at all times.”
- Keep Your Booze At Home. According to the Importation of
Intoxicating Liquors Act (which dates back to the time of prohibition
and bootleggers), you can only legally move a bottle of booze from one
province to another with the permission of the provincial liquor control
board. The situation changed on May 28th, 2012, allowing you to legally
move wine, but little else.
- It's Illegal To Attach a Siren To Your Bike in Sudbury, Ont. Since
1973, the only noise-makers Sudbury cyclists can attach to their bikes
are bells and horns. Breaking noise bylaws in Sudbury can lead to fines
up to $5,000.
- It's Illegal to Skinny Dip in Bancroft, Ont.
- According to Canada’s Currency Act of 1985, there are limits to the
number of coins you can use in a transaction. If it’s nickels,
vendors can say no to any purchase over $5, while the loonie limit is
$25.
- Taxi Drivers Can't Wear a T-Shirt in Halifax, N.S. According
to Halifax’s Regional Municipality Bylaws for Taxis and Limousines,
number 42 a) stipulates drivers must wear shoes and socks, keep their
attire in neat and tidy condition at all times, and absolutely cannot
wear a t-shirt.
- It was illegal for non-dark soft drinks to contain caffeine. Sprite,
Mountain Dew and other non-dark soft drinks couldn’t contain caffeine,
but that all changed in March 2010 with the advent of “energy drinks”
like Redbull. Now you can have caffeine in soft drinks like orange and
grape soda, however there is a limit, and it’s still lower than colas.
- It's illegal to build big snowmen in Souris, P.E.I. A local law warns residents against building
monstrous snowmen. If you live on a corner lot it’s against the law to
built a snowman taller than 30-inches.
- Thanks to lobbying by dairy farmers it was illegal to sell
butter-coloured margarine in Ontario until 1995. In fact, margarine was
altogether banned in Canada from 1886 to 1948 (there was a brief
reprieve during WW1).
- Keep Out of the Water in Toronto Harbour. According to the
Toronto Port Authority, you can’t swim anywhere in the harbour that
hasn’t been designated a swimming area by the City of Toronto.
- Keep Your Comics Clean. The way Canadian law currently stands, “Everyone commits an
offence who… (b) makes, prints, publishes, distributes, sells or has in
his possession for the purpose of publication, distribution or
circulation a crime comic.”
- Clotheslines Were Banned. Many Canadian communities long restricted the use of clotheslines
because they just didn’t like the look of them. Now because of increased
energy consciousness the provincial government has stepped in with a
ruling that overrides neighbourhood regulations.
- Keep Your Kids at Home in St. Paul, Alta. St. Paul residents
don’t have to worry about their kids sneaking out late at night. It’s
against the law for anyone 15 or younger to loiter in a public place
without supervision of a parent or guardian between 12:01 a.m. and 6
a.m.
And you thought we had it bad!!!
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Posted on November-03-12 8:25 PM
History of Daylight Saving Time
Why do we change the clocks to Summer Time?
The idea of a better use of daylight originates with
Benjamin Franklin, one of America's Founding Fathers:
Benjamin Franklin in a letter to the editors of the Journal
of Paris in 1784 wrote:
"I was the other evening in a grand company, where the
new lamp of Messrs. Quinquet and Lange
was introduced, and much admired for its splendor; but a general inquiry was made, whether the
oil it consumed was not in proportion to the light it afforded, in which case
there would be no saving in the use of it.
No one present could satisfy us in that point, which all agreed ought to
be known, it being a very desirable thing to lessen, if possible, the expense
of lighting our apartments, when every other article of family expense was so
much augmented.
I was pleased to see this general concern for economy, for I
love economy exceedingly.
I went home, and to bed, three or four hours after midnight,
with my head full of the subject. An accidental sudden noise waked me about six
in the morning, when I was surprised to find my room filled with light; and I
imagined at first, that a number of those lamps had been brought into it; but,
rubbing my eyes, I perceived the light came in at the windows. I got up and
looked out to see what might be the occasion of it, when I saw the sun just
rising above the horizon, from whence he poured his rays plentifully into my
chamber, my domestic having negligently omitted, the preceding evening, to
close the shutters.
I looked at my watch, which goes very well, and found that
it was but six o'clock; and still thinking it something extraordinary that the
sun should rise so early, I looked into the almanac, where I found it to be the
hour given for his rising on that day. I looked forward, too, and found he was
to rise still earlier every day till towards the end of June; and that at no
time in the year he retarded his rising so long as till eight o'clock. Your
readers, who with me have never seen any signs of sunshine before noon"...
He calculated that the citizens of Paris, France were
burning 127 million candles per year unnecessarily each year.
Benjamin Franklin proposed:
A tax: "on
every window that is provided with shutters to keep out the light of the
sun".
Energy rationing:
"Let guards be placed in the shops of the wax and tallow chandlers and no
family be permitted to be supplied with more than one pound of candles per
week."
A curfew after dark: "Let guards also be
posted to stop all the coaches that would pass the streets after sunset, except
those of physicians, surgeons, and midwives."
Community alarm
clocks: "Every morning, as soon as the sun rises, let all the bells in
every church be set ringing; and if that is not sufficient?, let cannon be
fired in every street, to wake the sluggards effectually, and make them open
their eyes to see their true interest."
The ideas lie dormant for 120 years...
120 years after Benjamin Franklin wrote a letter to the
editors of the Journal of Paris in 1784.
Daylight Saving Time, or Summer Time as it is known in
Britain, was proposed by William Willett
(1857 - 1915), who was a London builder living in Petts Wood in Kent.
In 1907 Willett's circulated a pamphlet to many Members of
Parliament, town councils, businesses and other organizations, he outlined that
for nearly half the year the sun shines upon the land for several hours each
day while we are asleep, and is rapidly nearing the horizon, having already
passed its western limit, when we reach home from work before it is over.
His proposal was to improve health and happiness by
advancing the clocks twenty minutes on each of four Sundays in April, and by
reversing this idea by the same amount on four Sundays in September. He
reckoned that it would not only improve health and happiness but it would save
the country £2.5 million pounds, that was also taking into account the loss of
earnings to the producers of artificial light.
Though the scheme was ridiculed and met with considerable
opposition, a Daylight Saving Bill was introduced in 1909, though it met with no
success before war broke out.
The idea of daylight saving time was first put into practice
by the German government during the First World War. In an effort to conserve fuel Germany and
Austria began saving daylight at 11 p.m. on the 30th of April, 1916, by
advancing the the clock one hour until October 1, 1916.
Britain (UK) began 3 weeks later, on 21 May 1916. This was
immediately followed by other countries in Europe, Belgium, Denmark, France,
Italy, Luxembourg, Netherlands, Norway, Portugal, Sweden, and Turkey.
Sadly, William had died the previous year so never saw his
idea put into effect.
In 1917, Australia, Newfoundland and Nova Scotia, Canada
initiated it.
On March 19, 1918, the U.S. Congress established several
time zones (which were already in use by railroads and most cities since 1883)
and made daylight saving time official (which went into effect on March 31) for
the remainder of World War I. It was observed for seven months in 1918 and
1919.
Most countries abandoned Daylight Saving Time after the war
had finished , most reintroduced it eventually, and some even began to keep it
throughout the year.
Oil Crisis
In 1968 to 1971 Britain tried the experiment of keeping BST
- to be called British Standard Time - throughout the year, largely for
commercial reasons because Britain would then conform to the time kept by other
European Countries. This was not good for the school children of Scotland as it
meant they had to always go to School in the dark. The experiment was
eventually abandoned in 1972, Britain has kept GMT in winter and BST in summer.
Information courtesy of Daylight-Saving-Time.com
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Posted on October-15-12 8:26 PM
PLACES I HAVE BEEN
I have been in many places, but I've rarely been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.
I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.
I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work. I live close so it's a short drive.
I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.
I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.
I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.
Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.
One of my favourite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!
And, sometimes I think I am in Vincible but life shows me I am not.
People keep telling me I'm in Denial but I'm positive I've never been there before!
I have been in Deepshit many times; the older I get, the easier it is to get there. I actually kind of enjoy it there.
So far, I haven't been in Continent. I don’t even remember what country it is in, but that's just an age thing. However, they tell me it is very wet and damp there. My travel agent tells me that I might be on my way there very soon.
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Unknown: Posted on October-09-12 8:02 PM
ONTARIO:
The
Premier of
Ontario is
jogging with
his dog along
a nature
trail.
A coyote jumps
out and
attacks the
Premier's dog,
then bites the
Premier.
The Premier
starts to
intervene, but
reflects upon
the movie
"Bambi" and
then realizes
he should stop
because the
coyote is only
doing what is
natural.
He calls
animal
control.
Animal Control
captures the
coyote and
bills the
province $200
testing it for
diseases and
$500 for
relocating it.
The Premier
goes to
hospital and
spends $3,500
getting
checked for
diseases from
the coyote and
on getting his
bite wound
bandaged.
The running
trail gets
shut down for
6 months while
Fish and Game
conducts a
$100,000
survey to make
sure the area
is now free of
dangerous
animals.
The Premier
spends $50,000
in provincial
funds
implementing a
"coyote
awareness
program" for
residents of
the area.
The provincial
legislature
spends $2
million to
study how to
better treat
rabies and how
to permanently
eradicate the
disease
throughout the
world.
The Premier's
security agent
is fired for
not stopping
the attack.
The province
spends
$150,000 to
hire and train
a new agent
with
additional
special
training re:
the nature of
coyotes.
PETA protests
the coyote's
relocation and
files a $5
million suit
against the
province.
SASKATCHEWAN:
Premier Brad
Wall is
jogging with
his dog along
a nature
trail. A
coyote jumps
out and
attacks the
dog.
The Premier's
security agent
shoots the
coyote and
keeps jogging.
The Premier
has spent
$0.50 on a .45
ACP hollow
point
cartridge.
The crows eat
the dead
coyote.
And
that, my
friends, is
why ONTARIO is
broke and SASKATCHEWAN is
not.
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Posted on September-22-12 5:37 PM
UP
This
two-letter word in English has more meanings than any other
two-letter word, and that word is 'UP'.
It is listed in the dictionary as an
[adv], [prep], [adj], [n] or [v].
It's
easy to understand UP , meaning toward the sky or at the top of the
list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP?
At a
meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP, and why are the
officers UP for election (if There is a
tie, it is a toss UP) and why is it UP to the secretary
to write UP a report?
We
call UP our friends,
brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver, warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We
lock UP the house and
fix UP the old car.
At
other times, this little word has real special meaning. People
stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets,
work UP an appetite, and
think UP excuses.
To be
dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.
And
this UP is confusing: A
drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.
We open UP a store in the
morning but we close it UP at night.
We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!
To be
knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look UP the word UP in the
dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4 of the
page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.
If you
are UP to it, you might
try building UP a list of the
many ways UP is
used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP , you may wind UP with (UP to) a hundred or
more.
When
it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun
comes out, we say it is clearing UP. When it rains, it soaks UP the earth. When
it does not rain for awhile, things dry UP.
One could go on and on, but
I'll wrap it UP, for now . . .
my time is UP!
Oh . .
. one more thing:
What is the first thing you do in the morning
and the last thing you do at night?
U P !
Did
that one crack you UP?
Don't
screw UP. Send this on
to everyone you look UP in your email address book . . . or not . . .
it's UP to you.
Now
I'll shut UP!
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unknown: Posted on September-20-12 9:59 PM
****** 23 ADULT TRUTHS ******
1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and
still not know what time it is.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I
was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font. (How true is this one!! You all know that you have wished this to be true!!)
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm
pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how
the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind-of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment
at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything
productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray?
I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it
asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical
report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know
not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday
or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom
and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you
just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a
word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars
team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay
strong, brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their
car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the
Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the
snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed,
first time, every time.
23. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in
1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only
took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also
important. |
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Sasha JaegerBaird: Posted on July-27-12 10:59 AM
Finally
- the masses may slowly be starting to understand ...
Somewhere,
somehow, someone has to pay the bills, and someone has to be
responsible for running up the bills.
Great T-Shirt! This really says it all. Sadly!
Couldn't find the word 'ineptocracy' in my old Webster's
dictionary so I Googled it and discovered it is a recently
"coined" new word found on T-shirts on eBay.
Read this one over slowly and absorb the facts that are within
this definition! I love this word and believe that it will become
a recognized English word.
Finally, a word to describe our
current political situation...
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Sasha JaegerBaird: Posted on July-25-12 1:45 AM
We who
have taught,
or love
children who
have been
taught, know
this is funny!
From the diary
of a
Pre-School
Teacher:
My
five-year old
students are
learning to
read. Yesterday one
of them
pointed at a
picture in a
zoo book and
said,
"Look at this!
It's a
frickin'
elephant!"
I took a deep
breath, then
asked..."What
did you call
it?"
"It's a
frickin'
elephant! It
says so on the
picture!"
And so
it does...
" A f r
i c a n
Elephant "
Hooked
on phonics!
Ain't it
wonderful?
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Posted on March-30-11 1:17 AM
I think he might be onto something here!
Letter in the The Parksville-Qualicum Beach News.
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Sasha JaegerBaird: Posted on March-27-11 7:33 PM
The
Center for Disease Control has issued a warning
about a new virulent strain of an old disease.
The
disease is called Gonorrhea
Lectim. It's pronounced "Gonna re-elect
'em," and it is a terrible disease.
The disease is contracted through dangerous and
high risk behavior involving
putting your cranium up your rectum. Many
victims contracted it in 2007 when
they re-elected the Harper Conservatives in
Canada and are now starting to realize how
destructive this sickness is.
It's sad because Gonorrhea
Lectim is
easily cured with a new drug just coming on the
market called It's pronounced "Vote-em-out". You take the
first dose in March 2011 and don't engage in
such behavior again; otherwise, it could become
permanent and eventually wipe out all life as
we know it in Canada.
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Posted on January-19-11 12:36 AM
In the year
2011, the Lord
came unto
Noah, who was
now living in
British
Columbia,
and said:
"Once again,
the earth has
become wicked
and
over-populated,
and I see the
end of all
flesh before
me. Build
another Ark and
save 2 of
every living
thing, along with a
few good
humans."
He gave
Noah the
blueprints,
saying: "You have 6
months to
build the Ark before
I will start the
unending rain
for 40 days
and 40 nights."
Six months
later, the
Lord looked
down and saw
Noah weeping in his
yard - but no Ark.
"Noah!,"
He roared,
"I'm about to
start the
rain! Where is the Ark?"
"Forgive
me, Lord,"
begged Noah,"but things
have changed."
"I needed a
building
permit."
"And I've been
arguing with
the Boat
Inspector about the need
for a
sprinkler
system."
"My neighbours
claim that
I've violated
the neighbourhood
by-laws by
building the Ark in
my
back garden
and exceeding
the height limitations. We had
to go to the
Local Planning
Committee for a
decision."
"Then the
Local Council
and the
Electric
Company
demanded a
shed load of
money for the
future costs
of moving
power lines
and other
overhead
obstructions,
to clear the
passage for
the Ark's
move to the
sea. I told
them that the
sea would be
coming to us,
but they would
hear nothing
of it."
"Getting the
wood was
another
problem. There's a ban on cutting
local trees in
order to save
the
Greater
Spotted Barn
Owl."
"I tried
to convince
the
environmentalists
that I
needed the
wood to save
the owls - but
no go!"
"When I
started
gathering the
animals the
SPCA took me
to court. They insisted
that I was confining wild
animals
against their
will. They
argued the
accommodations
were too
restrictive,
and it was
cruel and
inhumane to
put so many
animals in a
confined
space."
"Then the
Environmental
Agency ruled
that I
couldn't build
the Ark until
they'd
conducted an
environmental
impact study
on your
proposed
flood."
"I'm still
trying to
resolve a
complaint with
the
Human Rights
Commission on
how many
minorities I'm supposed
to hire for my
building
crew."
"Immigration
are checking
the Visa
status of most
of the people
who want to
work."
"The trades
unions say I
can't use my
sons. They insist I have
to hire only
union workers
with
Ark-building
experience."
"To make
matters worse,
Customs and Immigration
seized all my
assets,
claiming I'm
trying to
leave the
country
illegally with endangered
species."
"So, forgive
me, Lord, but
it would take
at least 10 years for me
to finish this Ark."
Suddenly the
skies cleared,
the sun began
to shine, and a rainbow
stretched
across the
sky.
Noah looked up
in wonder and
asked, "You mean
you're not
going to
destroy the
world?"
"No," said the
Lord.
"The
Government
beat me to
it." |
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Sasha JaegerBaird: Posted on October-16-10 2:39 AM
I have to preface this here by saying that I have done most of these things, but not all of them. I am making a few of them up, for some much needed humor at this point in the election. I will tell you which one's I have not done. Or maybe I will let you guess.... What NOT To Do While Running In An Election.... - Go out of the house, in the morning, just wearing your pyjamas, to drive your daughter to school. ( I actually have done this one) She was late and I was in a hurry. lol
- Forget to brush your hair in the morning before leaving your house. Getting home and realizing that it sticking straight out in every direction. (See above point, about driving my daughter to school.)
- Do the above two things, while trying to remain anonymous. (Hard to do when you have big signs on your car, with your name on them - opps.)
- Get your hair cut into a mohawk and color what's left of your hair, three or more different colors. (I haven't personally done this - at least not lately. Hey you never know, during an election, it might get you noticed.)
- Order elections signs with the lettering, for your name, the same color as the background. (It looked pretty good online, but not in person, from a distance.)
- Order metal sign stands, to hold your signs. To then try to put them into the ground, when the ground you are trying to put them into, is mostly rock and gravel. (It really doesn't work!! You have to supplement them with wooden stakes anyway, so you should have just not ordered them and gone with the wooden stakes.)
- Still not order metal signs stands, in a place that has winds that gust up to 120kph. (They don't hold up well, and tend to get bent, go missing and break. Thereby still needing the wooden stakes anyway!!)
- Address the candidate running for mayor, by the opposing candidates name. (Only okay, if both of them are named John!!)
- Having your outspoken daughter, who listens attentively to all you have been saying through the campaign process, attend the election candidates forum, and forget to tell her, that if she has anything to say during the evening, remember that it reflects upon her Mother. (I really had no idea she was going to get up and talk, let alone what she was going to say. But she is her mother's daughter and is very obviously quite passionate about her thoughts and feelings. You go girl!! Just next time, write it down first. This way you know what you are going to say, and then you say it the right way. I love you, honey!!)
- Get into a conversation with someone, while on the way to the bathroom, getting sidetracked and walking into the wrong restroom. (Didn't happen to me. Honestly!!)
- Go into the grocery store without a list of things you need. (If you don't have a list, I guarantee you will be back at least twice more, the same day!!!)
- The same point also can be used for the hardware store, The Bargain Shop, and just about anywhere else you have to go during the course of the day. (Campaigning can be hard on the brain matter.)
- Don't leave your house without your cell phone charged. (Without fail, you will be on a very important phone call, with a person who you don't have their number, and your cell phone will die. Let's hope they call back.)
- Don't lend your cell phone to your teenage daughter. (When you get it back, it will need charging. See above point.)
- Don't go out to put up signs on East Hillcrest Drive and forget to check your gas gauge before leaving the house. (Especially when you live in Coleman.)
- Don't plan a Halloween Dress-up Birthday Bowling Party for your teenage daughter, with at least eight of her giggling and hyper girlfriends, the week before the election and the same weekend as Thanksgiving. Especially when you promised to bring your famous layered salad (made 24 hours in advance) and your macaroni with ham & cheese salad, and have to make enough for 14 people. (Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
- Get a new pair of shoes to wear, the same day you go out door knocking for five hours!!
- Don't park you car, with it still running, in drive, while you get out to put up your signs. It may try to get away from you. (This never happened!!)
- Don't park your car, on an upwards hill, in neutral, without the e-brake on, while you get out to put up signs. It may roll back over you. (This didn't happen either!!!)
- Don't get out of your car, lock the doors, try to go into your house (after a long day of door knocking) and realize you just left the keys in the ignition, and the key ring had ALL your keys on it!! (This goes back to: Campaigning can be hard on the brain matter.)
- Don't try to open your second story window, at the same time you are trying to put something underneath it, to hold it open, while one hand is holding the window open and the other hand is trying to place the item underneath it. It will fall out the window, down the roof, while making a loud thunking and clunking noise, and onto the grass below and thus scaring your cats, your daughter and leaving you holding the window. (This is just about the funniest thing that has happened in a long time!! I really got a good laugh. And so did my daughter, once she realized what had happened!!) - What does this have to do with campaigning?? Nothing. But it was funny and I wanted to share it with you!!
- Don't ask anyone to do something for you, that you wouldn't do yourself. Chances are you will end up doing it anyway.
- Stay up all night Blogging, when you have door knocking to do the next day. (Your eyes will be blood-shot and not look very good.)
Good night everyone. I hope that you have a wonderful weekend!! |
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Sasha: Posted on October-09-10 12:18 AM
A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant operated by a fellow cannibal.
Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu....
Tourist: $5.00
Broiled Missionary: $10.00
Fried Explorer: $15.00
Baked or Grilled Politician: $100.00
The cannibal called the waiter over and asked, "Why such a high price for the Politicians?"
The cook replied, "Have you ever tried to clean one? They're so full of crap, it takes all morning." |
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Sasha JaegerBaird: Posted on September-17-10 8:30 PM
These are some confusing signs: Then these signs are the most confusing of all: |
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Sasha JaegerBaird: Posted on September-17-10 7:56 PM
I thought you might like some of these Funny Quotes and Sayings that I found.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded. When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out. If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
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